Hai?

So I know it's bad, but I think I might like you.

Yes. Very bad.

Shit hits the fan though, right?

The worst thing is, is that I dig myself into these holes. They are just there, so I just do it. I do not care to stop myself, because I simply do not want to.

It is inconvenient to the maximum.

'cept not really, because I do it to myself. I don't have to be like this, but I choose to be, because I like the rush.

Just another thing to add to the 'oh well' pile.

It's hard to fill a cup that is already full.

Sick.

I hate my life. Hate hate hate hate hate.
Not just this, everything is going against me. Worst month. Negative outcomes are overwhelming. Happiness. Is. Over.
It upsets me because I care about you and know you deserve so much better than that. You do not see the manipulative side. The worming ways into your heart are false. You do not see through that. Screams artificial.
As for you, our friendship is over with. Forever.

Dear -------

What you have done has really upset me. I never thought you would stoop so low. I've never been so angry at a person in my life. You are not a friend to me. What you have done is unforgivable. You mean nothing to me. I do not understand your ways. No one does. Thanks for nothing.

Fuckity.

What is going on? Nothing is going right. Absolutely nothing. School, parents...other people. I don't know what to do. Life does not agree with me. I feel like it's never going to get better. Ever. I don't want to 'just forget about it', because that can't happen. I can't just think of nothing, because what I do think about, there's something going on with it. I find myself crying and not being able to stop at the worst times. Oh well, shit happens I guess...

The End

Don't lie.
You betrayed me.
You hurt me.
I do not understand.
You do not deserve anything.
Anyone.
You are just a stupid, lying, self-centered bitch.
You do not care.
You are inconsiderate.
You do not give two shits about my feelings.
Hypocrisy is your sin.
Extreme.
Oblivion is your path.
Artificial friendship was your gift.
Dishonesty.
Your presence is sickening.
Deceit.
My respect for you is absent.
I will never trust you again.
Never.
Get out.

Exterior & Interior

On the exterior, she smiles like no other.
She is a positive soul.
Her actions sometimes take over her thoughts.
She laughs with those around her.
She isn't afraid to let impulse overthrow what is supposedly right.
She is fearless.
She does not get embarrassed easily.
She is honest.
She makes mistakes.
She learns from them.
She has been taught to think abstract.
She is alive.

On the interior, she does not want to live.
Her heart is an unrecognizable object.
Her mind is nowhere near where it should be.
She can only see in the dark.
Those who surround her are the ones she slips away from.
Her skin is ice.
She speaks noise but no words.
She falls and does not care to pick herself up.
Her thoughts implode.
She hates for love.
Her hiding place is pain.
She is lifeless.

Nothing.

There are no words.
No words to describe you.
No words exist to begin to describe how I feel toward you.
Die.
Die.
Die.

Let downs are always fun...

It's not even that big of a deal, but sometimes you bug me. I get the vibe that you don't really care as much about me as you think you do. I feel like you only care about me when you want to...the rest of the time you just let me deal with it myself or you figure someone else will so you don't have to. In fact, it's not even about dealing with it. It's about making me feel like I'm cared for, and you obviously don't give a flying fuck about that. It's like, just because I've been lenient with this whole situation gives you the right to abuse it. That shouldn't be the way it is. That's not what I set myself up for. I know you're more intelligent than that.

Arrhhjsjnghghhhvvvnvnghjghhgh.

You know those people that you just want to punch in the face? You just want to beat them down and see all the blood all over their face and rip out their intestines and wrap them around their neck and...
Maybe I'm going too far.
Some people just infuriate the fuck out of me. They do something, and I'm left thinking "What the fuck was the point of that? Are you seriously that immature?"
It makes me want to commit suicide. People are SO DUMB it makes me ill.